Embracing Simple Joys and Birth Preparation
I was bathing my baby just the other day, and he found such simple, pure happiness from pushing his four little ducks off the side of the bath. The joy he got from it was unlike anything I’d ever seen before. And it got me thinking: why don’t we, as adults, have that? When do we lose it? When does it go? Life would be so much more enjoyable if we could just hold onto that simple peace and harmony. I truly believe it can be applied to your birth and preparation, too.
Simply put, you need to feel excited, prepared, and understand how your body works and how your baby works. Tune out the outside noise. You don’t need everyone’s opinions. You don’t need everyone’s advice. You just need to hold onto what resonates with you - what feels important and relevant to you - and let the rest go.
I want to share a few things that helped me:
1. Learn Your Specific Risks
Understand exactly what’s going on with you, your body, and your baby during your pregnancy. Dig deep into the details of your health and your baby’s health. This deep dive might bring up some things that aren’t relevant, but it’ll also highlight what you truly need to focus on. You need to be the expert in your pregnancy.
Stop outsourcing the expertise to people who don’t value physiological birth. Don’t outsource the expertise to people who don’t have a uterus and don’t care about your baby the way you do. To them, you’re just another woman walking through the door with XYZ risk factors on paper. They don’t see you. They don’t see your feelings, your hormones, or your connection with your baby and partner. They don’t see your unique investment in this experience.
2. Slow Down
Slow down your day-to-day life. Stop chasing your tail. Find those moments of pause. Maybe it’s just standing still while the kettle is boiling, placing your hands on your bump, or intentionally watching how much milk you put in your tea. Hold the mug with both hands and take a deep breath before sipping.
I know, for me, this didn’t always look like that. Previously, I’d rush through everything—tea, milk, sit down at my desk, take a sip, and feel disappointed if it wasn’t as strong as I liked. But that’s because I was rushing.
So, I invite you to slow down. Find those moments of pause that allow you to intentionally bond with your baby. Work with your baby. Be with your baby.
3. Choose Your Environment Carefully
Think deeply about where and who will make you feel safest during your labour. You need to be able to feel safe enough to let go and trust your body when you’re in labour, and your baby is making their way earth-side. Feeling safe is the single most important thing.
As soon as there’s any tension or anxiety in your body, your brain picks up on it, and your body stops. It can take a long time to get back into a state of flow after that. Choose your environment carefully and delegate tasks to those in your space. The people you invite into your birth space need to understand their primary role: preserving that space, ensuring peace, and supporting your oxytocin flow. Oxytocin is the hormone that will help your baby arrive into the world in the most peaceful way possible.
4. Don’t Chase the Sunsets
Stop looking for what’s next. Enjoy the moment you’re in, because that’s all you have. This moment, whether peaceful or stressful, will pass. And when it does, you’ll look back and think, “Wow, I did it.” When the next challenge comes, you’ll remember that you’ve already done hard things, and you’ll be able to face it with strength.
So, trust yourself. Trust your body. Trust your baby. And know that every moment, every challenge, every success is part of your unique journey.